Christian Quotes
No man ever believes that the Bible means what it says. He is always convinced that it says what he means. -- George Bernard Shaw
Food Quotes
“Love means never having to say “Should we get dessert?”
― Unknown
Couch Puns
I'm studying the meaning of couches in different parts of the world.
It's really PhillySOFAcal.
Language Pick Up Lines
I may study semantics, but you're what gives my life meaning.
One Liners for Kids
Why are chefs so mean? They beat eggs and whip cream.
What do you cal purple when it is being mean? Violent.
Corona Virus Jokes
I am a mean green machine.
Hey, my parents are out of town. That means we have the haunted mansion all to ourselves.
Mermaid Puns
Mermaids can be quite mean. Salmon had to say it.
Grass Puns
Why do cows eat grass?
I mean, someone has to moo the lawn.
Nuts Puns
If you are what you eat, does that mean all squirrels are nuts?
Witch Puns
What time does the Wicked Witch have her clocks set to?
Greenwitch Mean Time.
Flower Pick Up Lines
Roses should learn what it means to be perfect from you.
Funny Winter Quotes
“A man says a lot of things in summer he doesn’t mean in winter.” – Patricia Briggs
Cow Puns
Why do cows think cooks are mean?
They whip cream.
Birthday Puns
More candles means a bigger wish!
Congrats on proving that getting older doesn’t mean getting wiser.
Science Puns
I spilled some acid on my aluminum fork and it dissolved…
but I didn’t mean to! It was an oxidant.
Funny Family Quotes
“Being part of a family means smiling for photos.” –Harry Morgan
Travel Pick Up Lines
You're like a dictionary - you add meaning to my life!
British Pick Up Lines
Yeah, you’re gonna love Big Ben. Oh wait, you mean the clock.
Egg Puns
Why is the chef so mean?
He beats the eggs.
Wine Puns
"Hakuna Moscato. It means drink wine."
Clever Jokes
A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing but you actually mean your mother.
Yoga Pick Up Lines
Your presence gives meaning to my yoga practice and enlightenment.
Knock Knock Jokes
Knock knock
Who's there?
To.
To who?
Surely you mean to whom.
Pick Up Lines
You're like a dictionary... you add meaning to my life.
Phone Number Pick Up Lines
What's your number?? Err I mean your name?
Love Puns
I cannot espresso
how much you mean to me.
Toxic Pick Up Lines
The fact that I'm missing some teeth only means that there's more room for your tongue.
France Puns
Living in france must be hard
I mean, 100 dollars is only a cent.
Literary Pick Up Lines
You’re like a dictionary—you add meaning to my life.
I don't mean to brag, but I'm one of the fastest speed-readers in the tri-county area.
Peach Puns
Peaches tend to be really mean. After all, they have hearts of stone.
Mouth Puns
I accidentally injured my girlfriend with a mouth organ.
I really didn't mean to harm Monica.
Space Puns
What does someone mean by a light year? The same as a regular year, but with less calories and fat.
St. Patrick's Day Puns
I’m going green, if you know what I mean.
4th of July Pick Up Lines
"The pursuit of happiness" means it's cool to hit on you, right?
Hockey Pick Up Lines
You know, less teeth means more tongue.
Medical Pick Up Lines
Honey, do you like water? That means you already like 80% of me.
Funny Aging Quotes
"When you’re older, Friday means less parking spots." - Larry David
"At my age ‘getting lucky’ means walking into a room and remembering what I came in for." - Unknown
Math Puns
What’s the best way to serve pi?
A la mode. Anything else is mean.
One Liners and Short Jokes
Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?
What does daylight-saving time mean in Seattle?
An extra hour of rain.
Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?
I hate being patronized.
By the way patronized means they speak with a sense of superiority and are condescending
Why shouldn't you marry a tennis player? Because love means nothing to them.
Hug Puns
What’s green and mean and stabs you when you hug it?
Cactus
Football Puns
I’m icing the kicker – and by kicker, I mean beer.
Mexican Pick Up Lines
I see you've got some tequila there, does that mean you're willing to give me a shot?
Puns
A mean crook going down stairs = A condescending con, descending
Thank you for teaching me about bargaining
It means a great deal.
I ate the exam paper
Which means that sooner or later I will pass the test
When a young adult goes to take a leak, does that mean they're a peenager?
Corny Jokes
Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?
Nerdy Pick Up Lines
You're like a dictionary, you add meaning to my life.
Funny Money Quotes
“If women didn’t exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning." ~Aristotle Onassis
